The next day, after luxuriating in the lowbrow, we climbed and climbed upon impossibly steep dirt roads until we broke through the ceiling of foliage and a view of the distant coastline was our paycheck. However, we had not made our way to almost seven thousand feet by our own steam, instead we had been scampered this high by 4×4’s, so really we deserved not this salary and we scampered away downwards. The Blue Mountain Peak is one heck of ride and is worth the journey to Jamaica alone. From the highest point you can see Cuba on a fair–weather day and all the way down the steep and narrow trail you are treated to a view of one of the most brilliant scribbles of trail anywhere. Unfortunately, although the trail from the peak is open to all brave souls, the trails that are undercover in the bush appear not on any map, so if you want to experience the alternative lines then you need the golden pass that only the Jamaican Fat Tire Festival holds.

After a few days exploring the Blue Mountain trails, swimming in paradise pools, chowing down on jerk and perhaps a little too much Appleton rum, we were treated to an all day drive back across the island accompanied by the badge of honour that was dubbed the ‘Ken Klowak Memorial Hangover’. One last swim in the ocean and that’s where we started this story. Scrubbing away the following and the preceding. I truly believe that this one week in Jamaica was one of the best weeks of riding and friending of my life and, if it wasn’t for the crud and crap on my bicycle, I wouldn’t entirely believe it had happened.

Do not discredit this trip as being entirely for the luxury of lucky git scribblers like myself. Not at all. This is an opportunity and open invite for everyone and anyone reading this. Paradise awaits, just be ready to chink a glass of sugarcane ferment and hide that lycra beneath a set of baggy shorts.

INFO

You can attempt to explore Jamaica independently, but I wouldn’t recommend it. There are no signs, no trail maps and no infrastructure for bikers yet. Instead I recommend you get involved with the Jamaican Fat Tire Festival. They organise an entire week of accommodation, riding, shuttles, food and rum. Jonathan and Andy go to great lengths to arrange the best week imaginable. Just follow the SMORBA rules and leave the lycra at home then come to make friends, not just skid marks. It is a laid back and the festival is rather like a family affair where most participants are regulars who have been coming for years and years.

The Jamaica Fat Tire Festival is held every year around the end of February. At his time of the year it is raining cats and dogs at home but in Jamaica the temperature is tropically temperate (20 degrees) and it is before the monsoon season. This year the festival coordinated with the half term holidays.

To get more information click into www.smorba.com

British Airways operate direct flights to Montego Bay airport regularly.

Although most of the trails are shuttle assisted, you would absolutely not wish to have a downhill bike. There are casual pedals between sections and heavy breathing in a full face is going to put a damper on an incredible experience. There are some very long descents involved (several hours on some trails) so a sturdy bike is required. An all–marketing bike, with an uppy downy seatpost is ideal.